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Amebo's corner |
Oga Don Get MBA!
Make una come hear tory O! E get one bobo, make I call am Oga. E come tell me say e dey go Nigeria. Small time I come hear say Oga don do MBA. Na wa O! Before una begin hail Lagos business school, make I tell you finish, dis kind MBA den no dey get for business school. Dis MBA dey stand for Marriage By Arrangement. Oga don decide say, Naija girls for America don spoil finish, so e go get fresh one from Naija. Ok, when Oga go, im carry serious cash money; make e live like millionaire for dat week of im holiday. Na so e just dey romance de girl. If na tantalizer, e get am, e wan go oceanview, den go land, double 4, no problem. De girl tink say, e don get bread plus butter. She dey tell her friends, “my fiancé is rich, he's into publishing and oil” I hear dey ting come laugh tire, de bobo dey work for kinko's and na gas station attendant for night. Na so she dey brag “I am going to live the rich life in America”. No be so my sister, you for ask me, I for tell you… Anyway, Oga na im wife come return to America, but Mrs. no dey happy, her mansion na one small 1 bedroom apartment, plus dem get roaches wey no wan pay rent. Na so I hear sha. Anyway my people, nay so one Sunday, some of us come land the bobo house, make we officially greet de wife. As we dey sit dere, na so so, dey wife dey bang pot for kitchen, Me sef, I dey fear small. I come ask Oga, you sure say your wife dey all right for kitchen? He say, she dey all right, she dey prepare serious nkwobi and ngwongwo, betta local food una Americana girls no sabi cook. Na so, all the bobo wey dey dere begin dey talk say how “homegrown Naija girls are better”. Oga come dey laugh big man laugh, aspe e don get betta wife. My people, na here when story come get K-leg. As he dey laugh so, na so de wife rush comot for kitchen. She carry pot for hand. Na im she come pour the whole ngwongwo for de man head. Begin dey shout “Useless man, you told me you were rich!” come run lock herself inside room. I ask Oga if e day all right, becos his eye dey red like say de ngwongwo don boil im brain. E come hiss say, dat stupid woman she don spoil finish! Ha! My people, Amebo don laugh tire!
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